when u try to caffeinate yourself and just end up increasing ur heart rate with no discernible changes in levels of exhaustion
i loved you, i did. i really wanted this to work, and it’s a shame that it didn’t. but, oh god, i still love you. you are the most interesting person i’ve ever met and your mind is the most beautiful thing. i’m so glad you shared your 3am thoughts with me, and it’s a shame that i won’t be hearing any more of them. i’m glad you shared your hopes and dreams for the future with me, and it’s a shame that i’m not a part of those dreams anymore. i’m glad i spent the majority of my year with you, and it’s a shame that our time together has been cut short. i’m glad i had the opportunity to be yours, and it’s a shame that i’ll be replaced soon, with someone better for you. i’m glad i got to hear your voice, and it’s a shame that i haven’t heard from you since the night you said goodbye. i’m glad i had the chance to sleep beside you, and it’s a shame that the left side of my bed is now empty (i still keep your pillow there, in case you change your mind). i’m glad you used to dance in my thoughts and in my dreams, it’s a shame that i can’t think or sleep anymore. i’m glad i could make you happy, glad i could make you smile and laugh, and it’s a shame that someone else is going to enjoy that view from now on. i’m just glad i had the chance to meet you, to love and be loved by you, to explore you. it truly is a shame that it’s over now, but please know that i loved you more than i have ever loved anyone or anything and i am still in love with you. i don’t think i can shake these feelings as easily as you could, and i’m sorry i couldn’t be what you wanted, i’m sorry this didn’t work as we had hoped, i’m sorry for loving you as much as i did. i’m sorry.